The Map is not the Territory

Time Traveling

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 13:06:00 +0000

I’ve always been fascinated with the notion of traveling back in time. Maybe it looks really cool to go back into time just like Michael J Fox in the Back to the Future series. You can even make yourself rich and powerful.

After watching Proposal Daisakusen, I changed my thoughts about traveling back in time.

If you had only one chance to travel back in time for a short period, what would you have done?

I believe most people would go back in time to alter something that they regretted not doing or had done.

Maybe…for someone that is special to the heart.

My Military experience.

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 12:54:00 +0000

An Australian friend asked me on my opinions on military training. Is it good or bad?

After my 5 years experience working in a conscript army, mixing with full time soldiers and enlisted conscripts, I would have to say it is subjective. It will be a good experience if you accepted the training positively and terrible experience if you think you are being forced into it.

Thinking back, I would say I took away with me positive skills which do help me later in life. I had the opportunity to go through the rigorous officer training; I had to manage the conscript platoon that was assigned to me and also spent time with reservists whom are professionals on their daily lives.

The following are what I feel I benefit from the whole experience:

1.Leadership training – There are many aspects to leadership to discuss on. I personally like the facet which I picked up through observation – the ability to convince others to follow in times of uncertainty. I have no control over the war, I cannot decide who will die, and I do not know what will happen, so how do you convince them to follow you?

2.Working in teams – We do not choose who we like to work with and we get punished as a group. This helps develop basic social skills and ability to work in teams. We are forced to think as a team and choose courses of action that will benefit the group rather than individual.

3.Self discipline – Doing laundry, personal hygiene, fitness and all the little chores that mommy used to do for you. There’s also the aspect of time management involved.

4.Working with different people – It’s an opportunity to realize there are many kinds of people out there. They have their problems, cultures and perspectives. On a personal level, I get to see the ugly side of people and learnt what not to do from a social point of view.

5.Fitness – I had never been fitter when I was in the army.

6.Appreciation – Appreciation for the little things I took for granted in life. Spending time crawling through mud and staying up late nights out in the mosquito infested forests – I learned to make better use of my free time with loved ones.

7.Teaching – I had never been good at public speaking but I had to teach troops lessons. Most of my audiences were older than me which make things even more difficult. However, I picked up from the senior specialists on how to give engaging lectures and conduct myself professionally.

8.Listening – I had to look after the welfare of my troops and hold personal meeting to listen to their concerns and problems. The first thing is to learn to build rapport – or the sessions will be over in 5 minutes; they will not tell you anything personal of they are not comfortable with you.

9.Earning respect – I still remember when I first stepped into my first assigned battalion; my troops saw me but never saluted. My platoon sergeant punished them for that. My platoon sergeant himself also never saluted me. Then I start to understand that true respect has to be earned. I had to walk my talk and join them in their training and prove to them that I’m capable for my officer role. Took me almost a month to get salutes that come naturally. Well, the easier way was buy salutes through punishment.

10.Integrity – On a personal level I believe integrity is - Doing what is right and question what is wrong. Never lie during war.

Did I enjoy myself in army? I find it stressful during my recruit and cadet days when you are trained by people who are sadists but I also learned a lot from experienced soldiers. For the time I spent in the army, I feel the benefits I had gotten are worth it.

And I thought this would only happen on TV

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 07:29:00 +0000

I think there’s a lot to learn from the following true story that I will be narrating. Sometimes, people are unpredictable; emotions make people commit serious mistakes. Let’s call the two key characters Rubbish and Vixen.

I moved into the house with Rubbish at the same time, it was not hard to notice that he seems to be visiting Vixen very often. I reside in a place shared by 9 people. I would often chat with vixen because she brings up interesting topics about the business situations back in her home country. She's a spoilt rich kid. She did mention to me once that Rubbish was kind of pestering her most of the time and getting ‘touchy’ and I gave her my 5 cents worth on how to tackle such issues.

Rubbish had a girlfriend back home and she will be coming to live with him in 3 months.

Somehow me and Rubbish drifted apart, he seems to have resentment against me but I was not too bothered. I did not find comfort adjusting to his somewhat selfish personality.

When I came back from my 1 week US trip, I did notice Rubbish and Vixen acting like couples. I queries if they were together and vixen got denied and got angry.

Then one day at 5 in the morning, I went out to get a glass of water, I heard Rubbish talking in the bathroom. Curious I stood and spied. Then I heard Vixen’s replying him. Feeling somewhat disgusted at the lies and activities, I slammed my door to let them know someone was awake and forced them to hide in the toilet. Heh.

Vixen also has a boyfriend back home. He loves her alot and sends her money to help her when she used up her dad's remittence.

So anyway I didn’t care until recently, I found my housemates gathering to discuss on the day Rubbish moved out. Rubbish had moved out to rent his own place to live with incoming girlfriend. One housemate was pissed because he still came back late night to pretend to pack up his stuff and hogged the phone for 2 hour to chat Vixen. Rubbish’s girlfriend was already here and sleeping at home.

So I finally got the whole picture:

1) Rubbish hated me because I was closer to Vixen in the beginning. I’m flattered to be seen as a threat.
2) Rubbish saw all the male housemates as a threat.
3) Rubbish cried once when Vixen went out to have meals with another housemate rather than him. I know- that’s so gay.
4) All of Rubbish’s ex-girlfriends were stolen from other guys. Probably that explains his mentality of “There’s no girls I cannot own.”
5) Rubbish tactic was to be highly persistent.
6) Vixen accepted him because he treats her well and does everything for her, e.g. cook for her, get glasses of water for her, carry her bag for her etc. Rubbish degraded himself as her bitch.
7) Rubbish’s girlfriend is older than him and has no university education; she borrowed money to fly to him. I think she plans to get married to him.
8) Rubbish’s girlfriend has no friends, he hold a tight rein on her and does not allow her to be with other guys.
9) Rubbish had been caught cheating once. (Oh yes)
10) Vixen confuses me, she keeps telling us how uncomfortable she is as Rubbish pesters her, despite all our advice, she end up getting involved with Rubbish.

Rubbish says that he does not want to give up on Vixen because he cannot stand his ‘woman’ to be with another man.

So anyway, Rubbish got caught by his ‘stupid’ girlfriend. He should have known better to judge women by intelligence, I reckon women have higher emotional awareness and she probably felt something was wrong when he started to chase Vixen and changed his daily habits or calling her. He got busted because he did not delete the photos taken on the ‘last few days’ where he went out with Vixen to have romantic dinner and ice skating shit. He should have been preparing for his girlfriend’s arrival.

Ethically, this should never have happened.

From a logical point of view, he already have the highest ROI in this investment and yet because of lame reasons refuses to let go. It was a matter of time and we laughed out asses off when he got busted on the 2nd night of his girlfriend’s arrival. I bet she searched his stuff when he was at out place calling Vixen.

The girlfriend actually forgave him. I think he’s probably all that she has and it will be devastating to fly back with nothing. She gave up her life to come to him and also in debt.

We got news that he will still try to keep this awful relationship going even though his girlfriend is locking him down. Vixen seems undisturbed but when asked if she would still carry on, she seems hesitant.

Seriously, what is wrong with these people?

It’s selfishness at its best.

Weird names.

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 05:14:00 +0000

I was looking through a friend's online photo album and was wondering why she was tagging the pictures as "Nice" or "Nice - Town Square" when the pictures weren't exactly spectacular. Then i slowly come to realise that the place was named NICE.

I went to googling and shortlisted some places that I wouldn't want to end up living in:

Bastard (Norway)
Fucking (Austria)
Dikshit (India)
Bloody Dick (Montana, USA)
Dildo (Newfoundland, Canada)
Seymen (Turkey)
Black Butte (Oregon, USA)
Elephant Butte (New Mexico, USA)
Big Cockup and Little Cockup (England)
Twatt (Orkney, UK)

However come places can be cool:

Blowhard (Australia)
Petting (Germany)
Titting (Germany)
Long Dong (Guangxi, China)
Licking Valley (Ohio, USA)
Wet Beaver Creek (Australia)
Sexmoan (Luzon, Philippines)
Mount Mee (Australia)
Fingeringhoe (Essex, UK)
Climax Springs (Missouri, USA)

What Happened to All the Nice Guys?

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 01:52:00 +0000

A guy claimed that this is the most common question in a girl's mind and posted the answer to this question.I thought I should evaluate his views.

I wonder, is that a question or a complaint?

What happened to all the nice guys?

I see this question posted with some regularity in the personals section, so I thought I'd take a minute to explain things to the ladies out there that haven't figured it out. The answer is simple: you did. Blaming yourself is never simple.

See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were fcking treated you. As a guy, he have a hundreds of better thing to do than tagging with a girl and listening to her whine. (e.g. His own happy time with porn, saving the world through his computer games, get pissed drunk with his best mates complaining about how hard it is to understand girls, go pray at the temple for the best girlfriend and luck at punting, etc) The only reason he is putting in so much effort because he assessed that he has a high probability to get hooked up. Or he's just highly infatuated and started swimming out into the ocean of stupidity.

At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. That's pretty smart - get people to notice you. What's the point when no one knew you existed? They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Everything started from friends Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease. You better be damn tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish to make that kind of judgment on others.

Eventually, your platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. That sounds a disease among girls - letting emotional judgment take over rationality and picking the wrong boyfriend So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"

Well, once again, you did.

You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating reciprocated? that's naive! it's like expecting to win at all gambles , in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. Hallelujah He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. Nope, he should realize that people as a whole are selfish. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. That took long for someone to realize that! lol He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an asshole than he ever wanted to be. Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.

So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:

1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your as.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.
Ignore all the 3 suggestions, especially number 3. Start thinking rationally and make better decisions.

I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you. I totally disagree. What constitute a nice guy is very subjective. From a marketing point of view, to believe that all women defines 'nice guys' as an exclusive package is suicidal. A dude should always understand his strengths and target at women who see his strengths as "nice guy attributes" Seriously, learn from the players - They got it right in the first place. You can be as good as a player but not accepting their moral values.

If you were five years younger.

So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've fcked
yourself over. You're getting old. Same advice for guys, learn and grow up.

There is no such thing as failure in relationships but poor communication.

If she wants a little red car, don't try to sell her a little blue car. If the red car costs too much to make, find someone who is willing to pay lots more than for a little blue car. You have options, it's a matter if you see it or not.

Milton Erickson's hypnotic language patterns

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:06:00 +0000

The Milton Erickson's hypnotic language patterns causes ambiguity in any representational system which helps to induce trance. They can be used as a converted means to intentionally influence others, I personally love the tag questions, double binds and extended quotes.

1) MIND READ: Claiming to know the thoughts or feelings of another without specifying the process by which you came to know them.

"I know that you are wondering.. . "

2) LOST PERFORMATIVE: Stating a value judgment without specifying whose judgment it is.

"And it's a good thing to wonder.. . "

3) CAUSE & EFFECT: Stating or implying that one
thing causes another. Stated or implied Cause &
Effect patterns include:

a. C E (C makes E happen.)
b. E because C
c. If ... then ...
d. As you... then you...

"Because.. "

4) COMPLEX EQUIVALENCE: Equating two things, or saying that their meanings are equivalent.

"That means.. . "

5) PRESUPPOSITION: Assumption.

"You are learning many things.."

6) UNIVERSAL QUANTIFIER: A set of words that generalizes to 'all' cases or 'no' cases.

"And all the things, all the things.."

7) MODAL OPERATOR: A word such as 'can', 'might', 'should', 'must', or 'ought' which implies possibility or necessity.

". . .that you can learn..."

8) NOMINALIZATION: Changing process words (or verbs) into nouns. The most common nominalization is adding -ing to a verb to make a noun.

"Provide you with new thoughts, and new understandings." (The speaker has changed the process words think and understand into the nouns thoughts and understandings.)

9) UNSPECIFIED PREDICATE: Omitting the verb, or the object of the verb, or both.

". . .and you can. " (Can what?)

10) TAG QUESTION: A question added after a statement, designed to dissolve resistance.

"Can't you ? "

11) LACK OF REFERENTIAL INDEX: Using a general subject that does not refer to a specific person.

Examples: people, they, it, one, that.

"One can, you know.. . "

12) COMPARATIVE DELETION (UNSPECIFIED COMPARISON): Using comparative words without saying who or what the comparison is being made to.

"And it's much more useful.. . "(than what?)

13) PACING CURRENT EXPERIENCE: Describing what the client is currently experiencing in a way which is undeniable.

"You are sitting here, listening to me, looking at me, etc.. . "

14) DOUBLE BIND: An illusion of choice where either choice will lead the listener to do what the speaker is suggesting.

"You can learn everything you need now.. . or you can learn in the next two days."

15) CONVERSATIONAL POSTULATE: A question to which the response is either "Yes" or "No." In allowing the client to choose his response, this pattern avoids authoritarianism.

"Do you feel this is something you understand? "

16) EXTENDED QUOTES: A series of quotes embedded within one long sentence, where the speaker quotes one person talking about what was said by a second person who was talking about what was said by a third person, etc.

"Last week I was with James who went to the 2008 conference, when he talked to someone who said.. . "

17) SELECTIONAL RESTRICTION VIOLATION: Attributing consciousness to an inanimate object or a mode of communication to a creature that does not have that mode.

"A toy can have feelings.. . "

18) AMBIGUITY

a. PHONOLOGICAL: Using two words with different meanings that sound alike in the same sentence; or using one of them in a context where it could also be taken for the other.

"You can hear that here.. . "

"You can believe you're unconscious.. . " (The listener can hear this also as "You can believe your Unconscious.")

b. SYNTACTIC: Using a combination of words
that has more than one possible meaning.

"They are visiting relatives."

c. SCOPE: Using a modifier in a linguistic context where it is unclear which other part(s) of the sentence the modifier refers to.

"Speaking to you as a child.. . " (Who is the child?)

"The disturbing noises and thoughts.. . " (Are the
thoughts disturbing?)

d. PUNCTUATION:
Run-on sentence: Using the last word or phrase in a sentence as the first word or phrase of the next sentence.

"I want you to notice your hand me the book."

Pause at unexpected place:

"As you read this.. . report, you'll gain new insights. "

Incomplete sentence:

"I know that you expect."

19) UTILIZATION: Utilizing all that happens or that the client says.

Client says: "I'm not ready. "
Response: "That's right, you're not ready, yet, because you haven't asked the one question that will have you totally and completely ready. "

Where the Hell is Matt?

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 03:32:00 +0000

Finally the final video is up.

Matt travels around the world to do his special little video and I was part of it.

My little piece of internet history!

Coporate Culture

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Sat, 21 Jun 2008 03:37:00 +0000

My friend was frustrated about how she and her boss cannot agree on the objectives in her company's marketing planning. She is into long term planning and her boss insists on short term planning.

I took that as an opportunity to discuss with my favorite marketing lecturer, Bob Miller.

This is my takeaway:

The Universities are teaching us the latest theories/practices in business management. However, the people sitting at the top and middle are generally the baby-boomers. In their time of struggle, such theories and practices were not adopted. It's a matter of mindset. They are comfortable with the way they do business (which was proven) and they will re-train you to be like them.

Stallkamp mentioned is his book SCORE! A better way to do business: Moving from conflict to collaboration that western automobile companies recognized Toyota's global success in their unique way of business and tried to mimic it. They all achieved little success or failed. Their implementations plan made a lot of sense, however, the mindset and culture prevented the success of those implementations.

I guess the word here would be change leadership. Drawing reference to a famous case study of Bill Bratton, it does require a position of power to bring about change in a large organization. this sadly implies that at lower level position, one cannot create significant changes.

Do we stop then? Bob suggests that we can try to make small changes (within your jurisdiction) which produces significant results and get the attention of higher management. Perhaps, that could serve as a portfolio when you have the opportunity to contribute to greater positive changes in the organization.

Or join an organization that already has that culture. Keyword: LEAN

On a lighter side, we could all just wait for these stubborn people to all retire or die off .

Just another Personality Questionaire

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 03:35:00 +0000

Three Things You Want To Do Before You Die:
1) To own a successful business.
2) To become an awesome NLP practitioner.
3) To travel around the world.

Three Names You Go By:
1) Azuki Inase
2) bbybby
3) Bunny

Three Screen Names You Have Had:
1) Azuki
2) Kimochi
3) BDRC

Three Physical Things You Like About Yourself:
1) My Height.
2) My Lanky Built.
3) Thank god for my normal looking Penis.

Three Parts Of Your Heritage:
1) Singaporean.
2) Half Dong Guan Cantonese.
3) Half Fu Jian.

Three Things That Scare You:
1) Fat chicks oozing out from their tight flashy clothes.
2) Needles.
3) Gore.

Three Of Your Everyday Essentials:
1) Facebook.
2) A working mobile phone.
3) Internet.

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1) A hairstyle that needs trimming soon.
2) A pair of cute socks to keep my feet warm.
3) A brown jacket to keep myself warm.

Three Of Your Favorite Bands/Musical Artists:
1) L'Arc-en-Ciel
2) Linkin Park
3) Famous Classical Musicians like Pachebel.

Three Of Your Favorite Songs:
1) L'Arc-en-Ciel - Lost World
2) Linkin Park - Numb
3) Pachebel - Canon D

Three Celeb crushes:
1) Vivian Chow.
2) Winona Ryder.
3) Takeuchi Yuko.

Three things you just can't do:
1) Be naturally good looking.
2) Stop irritating people with my constant photography.
3) Stop being inquisitive.

Three new things you want to try in the next 12 months:
1) Memorize the Japanese Hiragana and Katagana tables.
2) Do well in my University tutor job.
3) Complete my thesis requirements.

Three Things You Want In A Relationship:
1) Enjoyable companionship.
2) Great communication.
3) Great Sex.

Three Physical Things About The Preferred Sex That Appeal To You:
1) Lively, sparkling eyes.
2) A Pretty face.
3) Big boobs.

Three Of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1) Watching Japanese Animations & Dramas.
2) Reading and
3) Being a Facebook Junkie.

Three Things You Want To Do Really Badly Right Now:
1) See my girlfriend.
2) Go explore a Japan.
3) Graduate from my Honours Program.

Three Careers You're Considering / You've Considered:
1) Business Consultant.
2) Marketing Guru.
3) NLP Master Practitioner.

Three Places You Want To Go On Vacation:
1) Japan.
2) Hawaii.
3) Hong Kong.

Three Kid's Names You Like:
1) Theodore.
2) Celeste.
3) Garion.

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically a Girl:
1) Cry watching touching dramas.
2) Liking the colour Red.
3) Being a difficult person to understand.

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically a Boy:
1) Very Messy.
2) No interest in Shopping.
3) Watch and trade pornography.

Pejorative terms for people

noreply@blogger.com (Azuki Inase) — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 03:29:00 +0000

I was having a conversation with a friend over MSN and she complained that people mistake her for being an "Ah lian".

What exactly qualifies one as an Ah lian? Google.

Wiki says "Ah Lian is a pejorative term commonly given to a certain group of young Chinese girls in Southeast Asia, especially Singapore and Malaysia.

These Chinese girls, whose collective age ranges from their adolescent years to late 20s, are usually centralised in the busier and more developed cities in the region. They are regarded as bimbos, and are stereotyped as anti-intellectual, superficial, materialistic, and shallow.

Ah Lians are commonly stereotyped as having hair dyed in gaudy and bright colours, and attired in fashion mimicking hip-hop culture, although how much of this is true is debatable. Much like their male counterparts - that is, Ah Bengs - Ah Lians are also thought of as being excessively flashy and show-offs."

The interesting thing was not the qualifications of Ah lians but more of the fact that there are so many pejorative terms for people out there.

Wiki's pejorative terms

F65s, Fag Hags, Indian giver, Green Ink... there's a lot of creativity out there.

For amusement, I shall invent my own pejorative term.

Donut Hunters (m)/ Lollipop Huntress (f)

Donut Hunters is a pejorative term commonly given to a certain group of young men in Southeast Asia, especially Singapore and Malaysia. These young men, whose collective age ranges from their adolescent years to late 20s, are usually centralised in discos and alcohol-serving establishments.

They are regarded as playboys and uncommitted in relationships. Donut hunters are commonly stereotyped as having a habit in engaging in one night stands. Much like their female counterparts - that is, Lollipop huntress - they are also thought of as being excessively flirtatious.

The Donut Hunter "culture" is especially prevalent in nightspots where the 'hunting' for one night stands occurs most often.

The flavors are used to describe the ethnicity or traits of their targets (e.g. Lemon Donut Hunter) :

1) Orange - describes people of Chinese race.

2) Chocolate - describes people of race with dark skin.

3) Cherry - describes Virgins.

4) Vanilla - describes people of Caucasian race.

4) Lemon - describes people of Oriental/Caucasian mix.